The end of the year is quickly approaching, bringing with it lots of celebrations with friends and family that bring happiness to our spirits. While exciting and fun, these holiday gatherings might not be 100% enjoyable for everyone, especially those with specific needs or differences.
There are many factors that can contribute to a potentially negative experience for children during holiday festivities. These factors could include strict family traditions, specific religious beliefs, and/or different environments or locations. Due to said circumstances, these “celebrations” can be particularly overwhelming, frustrating, or just plain boring for children on the spectrum and/or with sensory differences.
Some families are very formal in regards to the traditions that they follow this time of year. However, when a family member is on the spectrum or has special needs, it is important to be sensitive and flexible to their needs. By considering how these traditions and gatherings may affect those with sensory differences, you can take steps to be more inclusive and accommodating in order to ensure a more positive experience for everyone involved. It’s important that all family members get to really enjoy this special time together during the holidays!
At big parties or public events, it is common for those with sensory differences to have sensory overloads. This can be caused by numerous things, including the amount of people, number of food options, loud noises, strong smells, visual stimulus, etc.- or a combination of all of these! Because every person is unique, those affected may react differently to these situations, and perhaps in a way that might seem disruptive or disrespectful to those who may not fully understand the circumstances.
Here’s a helpful hint for a better understanding of what this might be like: Try putting yourself in their shoes! Consider the following distractions commonly faced by someone with sensory differences, and how this might affect their overall experience at a holiday gathering:
Wearing formal, sometimes itchy clothes without the option to change
Having limitations on what you can and cannot eat due to uncontrollable allergies and intolerances
Over-stimulating lights, music, conversations, smells, etc. that you can’t escape
For some people, even the changes in their usual routine can be so overwhelming that they’re not even in the mood for a party. Combine these changes with the previously mentioned factors, and things can escalate quickly. With that being said, this of course, doesn’t mean that everybody needs to adapt and cater specifically to the person with sensory differences or different needs. It’s important to create an inclusive environment, but also one with the shared goal that everyone (different needs or not) enjoys their time spent together.
If your family wants to celebrate holidays and special events year-round, it’s beneficial to educate those involved about any special accommodations being made. This ensures everyone knows what to expect and can plan accordingly. It’s also essential to ask everyone for understanding, acceptance, and empathy. This then leads to confidence in your ability to assure your child that they’ll be attending a safe event where they’re free to be themselves.
In order to assure your child that they are safe and supported, you might try including some of the following ideas in conversations before a family gathering:
It is okay to have some quiet time, maybe even in another room. It is not because you are ignoring family time; it is because you are self-regulating your emotions.
It is okay to make the time and space for stimming. It is not a purposely-disruptive behavior; it is self-stimulation to focus and clear your mind of distractions.
It is okay to attend a party in comfortable clothing. You are not being rude by ignoring the dress code; you are keeping your Sensory Processing Disorder under control.
It is okay to bring your own food to an event. This doesn’t mean you aren’t using proper manners or being rude to the host; you are catering to your own food allergies and/or food intolerances.
It is okay to bring your noise-canceling headphones. You are not purposefully ignoring people; you are keeping your Sensory Processing Disorder under control.
It is okay to avoid hugs and kisses. You are not being disrespectful or unaffectionate; you are keeping your Sensory Processing Disorder under control.
It’s important to understand that not every family member, friend, or place will be able to make the necessary accommodations for your child. In situations that aren’t exactly ideal, just remember to support your child the best way possible and love them exactly the way they are. You might even begin teaching them the importance and power of advocating for themselves when appropriate so that later in life, they’ll be able to confidently do so on their own. When a child grows up in a safe, happy, and supportive environment, their opportunities for thriving and succeeding in life skyrocket.
The holidays can be stressful for everyone, but by spreading awareness and exercising a little bit of empathy, you can ensure that everyone enjoys the festivities in their own unique way.
Have a safe and joyful holiday season!
Since this information can be read online anywhere in the world, I encourage you to visit The St. Anthony School Webpage: https://www.thestanthonyschool.com and Social Media: Facebook, Instagram & YouTube Channel for more information about Autism and other Neurological Disorders.
About the Author:
Alicia MC is a Writer, a Neurodiversity Advocate, and a Corporate and Social Media Marketing Specialist eager to share her experience & knowledge to help others.